Marriage4 min read

What are the signs of a loveless marriage?

A loveless marriage is less about fighting than about absence: little affection, conversations limited to logistics, and two people living parallel lives. It's common. In a 2025 Ipsos survey for Gleeden, 51% of urban Indians said they felt emotionally disconnected from their partner, even though 94% called their relationship happy.

By ALTER Editorial · Published

Key takeaways

  • The signs are mostly absences: little affection, logistics-only conversation, parallel lives and loneliness in the same room.
  • It usually comes from slow drift, such as overwork, parenting and unspoken resentment, rather than one event.
  • Emotional distance is common: 51% of urban Indians in a 2025 survey felt it, even in relationships they called happy.
  • Options range from honest talks and counselling to separation; many separated Indians never formally divorce.
  • The hardest part is often deciding whether both of you still want to try.

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01—Signs

What are the signs of a loveless marriage?

One bad month isn't a loveless marriage. These signs matter when they last, and when neither of you is trying to change them.

  • You talk mostly about bills, children, chores and schedules.
  • Affection has faded: little touch, few compliments, no curiosity about each other's day.
  • You'd rather be busy, on your phone or anywhere else than alone together.
  • Disagreements no longer get resolved; they just stop being raised.
  • You make plans, and picture the future, without your partner in them.
  • You feel lonely even when they're in the room.
02—Why

Why do marriages go quiet?

Rarely because of one event. More often it's years of small things: work that takes the best hours, children who take the rest, resentments never talked about, and an assumption that closeness will look after itself. In Gleeden's 2025 survey, a third of respondents blamed work-life imbalance and too little time together, millennials most of all.

In India, many marriages also begin as arranged matches between people who build closeness after the wedding (the numbers are here). When that closeness never fully forms, or fades, couples often stay together for family, children and social reasons long after the connection has gone.

03—Options

What can you do if you're in a loveless marriage?

There's no single right answer, and people make different choices for good reasons.

  • Talk about it honestly, at a calm time and without blame: what you miss, not what they've done wrong.
  • Try couples counselling. A neutral third person can help both of you say difficult things.
  • Change something concrete: time together without phones, shared plans, small daily attention.
  • Look after yourself: friends, interests, health, a life that isn't only the marriage.
  • If nothing changes, consider separation or divorce, with legal advice (how divorce works in India).
  • Some people stay for children, family or money and look for connection elsewhere. That choice carries real risks, and it's worth being honest with yourself about it (on emotional affairs).
04—Staying or leaving

Should you stay in a loveless marriage?

Only you can answer that, but a few questions help. Is your partner willing to try? Have you both actually tried, with help, or only hoped? What would your life look like in five years if nothing changed? And what are you staying for: love that's buried, or fear of what leaving would mean?

Many Indians who leave a marriage never formally divorce. The 2011 Census counted 35.4 lakh people separated from their spouse, more than twice the 13.6 lakh who were divorced.

05—FAQ

Questions, asked quietly.

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  • Often, if both people want to try. Counselling, honest conversations and deliberate time together help. It's much harder when only one person is willing.

  • It's common. In a 2025 Ipsos survey for Gleeden, 51% of urban Indians felt emotionally disconnected from their partner. Common doesn't mean you have to accept it.

  • Usually slow drift, such as overwork, parenting, unresolved resentment and no time together, rather than a single event.

  • It's a personal decision. Many parents stay; others decide a calmer life apart is better for everyone. A family counsellor can help you think it through.

  • Neither of you wants to try any more, affection and conversation have been gone for a long time, and you picture your future without your partner. A counsellor can help you tell a rough patch from an ending.

Sources

  1. The Week (PTI): Gleeden–Ipsos May 2025 survey on relationships in India
  2. SheThePeople: Census 2011 figures on divorced and separated Indians
  3. NCAER: How much agency do Indian women have in marriage choices? (IHDS 2011–12)

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